Things have changed a lot lately.  I used to be a very jolly person.  But now, I always feel angry, upset and hurt.  I don’t want to feel this way.  But I can’t feeling it.

I feel like I’ve been used and abused.  There’s no room for self-pity, I know.  But give me some time to feel the pain first and to deal with it head on.  After which, I can learn how to just ignore anything that will go my way.

Life is give and take.  But it is fatal to expect something in return for every good deed that you do.  Makes me wonder if it’s wrong to expect a positive or good return for my good deed.

It’s not fair na libakon ka sang tao na ginconsider mo friend.

It’s not fair na mulayon ka sang ginpalangga mo nga utod.

It’s not fair na himuan ka storya.

It’s not fair na pakalainon ka sa damo nga tao.

That and more…

In those cases, who would not boil up?

It would have been better if I have something with which I can release what I’m feeling inside.  But I have nothing.  All I have is myself.  And if ever I do something that will ruin myself people will not even dare to care; rather I will just prove them right.

If there’s one wish that a fairy god mother can give me, that would be something that can give me the chance to say all the things that I longed to say to people who have inflicted so much pain in me.  But I suppose that’s impossible…It will never happen.

The end of it all – Just get on with your life Jacqui.  Life is indeed unfair.  No matter what you there will always be twists and turns along the way.