At some point in our life we get to meet people who can be our BFFs or plain and simple friends. But behind this seemingly simple word, lies a seven-letter word that can completely ruin things which you thought are built to last. You may never know it or you might as well sense it from the start…the thing is, you have to know how to deal with them.
Real people can be consistent…absolutely consistent at whichever angles you see them…In fact, even if you’re not looking at them, they project the same behavior towards you; whether it be good or bad. Pag ayaw ka nila, ayaw ka nila…pag gusto, gusto.
Now when you meet people who can be easily persuaded by the others, then that can either mean your friendship has not rooted that deeply yet, or that person whom you considered a friend really doesn’t feel the same feeling at all. The very obvious scenario would be these people loving you like their idol when you’re with them, but hating you to hell when your back is against them. Expert plastics can even make you feel truly liked and loved for a long period of time, only to find out that they never did actually. Their charade seems so real that you completely fall prey into their trap.
Why do plastic people exist? Others would say they were naturally born by nature. But I personally believe that such behavior can also be learned or inherited.
If both parents or most relatives are plastic then you can conclude that it definitely runs in the blood. But if not, it must have been inherited. How can it be inherited? The answer to this is also the same answer to the question HOW CAN WE SAVE OURSELVES FROM THIS PEOPLE.
Living is like business partnership. It should be a win-win relationship. A little help may be extended by one party to another but it the dilemma is this: when the help expects nothing in return you will be called stupid or people would still think that MAY BAYAD GID NA YA. It looks like you have nowhere else to go right? Putting it in my own history, someone even said: GINABAKAL KO ANG TAO…MUNA NAPAKAON KO ANG TAO BECAUSE MAY NAPAABOT KO NGA SOMETHING IN RETURN SUCH AS MAGIGING MAAYO SILA SA AKON. And even if you were someone who really didn’t think of it that way, your BP will surely rise to boiling point and might as well fulfill the prophecy. But then again, the end justifies the means…You just proved the judgment right….
Real friends do not need your explanation because they already understand. False friends also do but they intend to pressure you by making you prove to them that you’re indeed good by living up to their expectations. Now that one is silly…because it simply means plastic ka rin. Just be true to yourself…because real friends will understand you no matter what…plastic friends won’t because they’re binded to their self-centric and egocentric attitudes.
How will you know if someone is real or not?
Your instinct and gut feeling as a woman can say it 😉 unless you’re someone too pessimistic that you always look at things and people negatively.
Friendship is offered for FREE. So with or without anything in return, true friendship remains and endures. Why not say NO for one time and test the waters from there? If things change then you can proceed to plan/experiment B. No gifts except during special occasions. You see, plastic people become overly friendly but when you have something for them but become surprisingly distant when you have none. This may not be true for all, but in most cases this is observable. I tell you, when your fake friendship ends you’ll simply wonder what have you done wrong and they will just tell you NGAA NANGAYO KO HAW? PILA GID TO TANAN KAY IPASLAK KO SA TSURA MO AKON BAYAD…without thinking that you’re not after the amount in return but their good heart.
Trials to test if friends are true should be in countless ways…but plastic one fails even after test 1 or 2. Investigate if you can. What’s the use of social networking sites? Believe me, you’ll discover a heap of proofs from there.
What then if you find out that your friends are plastic? No matter how high you respect them, no matter how you value them, no matter how you look up to them, no matter how much time/effort/material stuff you have invested on them, let go! There’s no use holding on to something that was never yours in the first place. The truth may hurt…terribly…but it will surely set you free.
One thing that you shouldn’t do – never dare to talk to them to change thinking that talking will save everything. Well, you can give it one more try depending on their reaction. But as for me, once is enough! HURT is a simple English word that goes with various synonyms understandable by even a Grade 1 pupil. Are your friends in pre-school? If they valued you as much as you valued them, then they couldn’t have fooled/hurt/used you in the first place.
Things may accept a great impact from you. But it is quite difficult to put a significant effect on people. So to avoid more stress and pain, disengage! Just be ready with what will happen next…you might feel more pain…You must have been very open to these demons before and they might use the info you disclosed to them to blackmail you. Be strong. Be firm. Even if it will humiliate you…even if it is disgusting…accept it and deal with it. It’s like choosing between letting the bad go or living a hell-like lifetime with your fake friends. After all, this is another lesson that you ought to learn in a hard way so you can be wiser in choosing friends in the future.
I’ve been blessed with both kinds of friends since the time I learned what friendship was. Lately, I’m sensing some fake ones. Disengaging from them is easier said than done because of some circumstances. But once you adhere to the idea that no one should be in control of your life, you can do it. I can do it!